Deep Waters
by Grace of Mercury
Summary: Ami is a little slow at her job and this creates a huge rift between her and the other scouts; Ami goes to a prep college in America and rediscovers herself while the scouts cope with her loss. PLEASE, R
1. Ami's Fault

Title: Deep Waters  
  
Author: Grace of Mercury  
  
Author's Note: Hi! This is my second attempt at fanfic, so please be gentle! R&R, and you can e-mail me at graceofmercury@yahoo.com with comments, suggestions, etc. Also, read my other fic, it's an original, but I think it's good! Anyway, this fic is centered around Ami, and her thoughts and feelings in a sort of alternate universe.  
  
Ami sighed, looking up at the clock from the enormous amount of schoolwork that she had piled up on her table. She was about to start on her English homework when her communicator beeped.  
  
"Mercury, there's an attack at the park. We need you, now!" Sailor Moon's worried face showed up.  
  
"I'll be right over! See ya soon." Mercury quickly reached the park and pulled out her henshin pen and cried, "Mercury Power, Make-up!" Mercury quickly started typing briskly on her computer. The other scouts kept attacking the hideous youma, which was spraying lethal jets of acid around. Ami continued to type away furiously at her computer, and appeared to be in deep concentration. The scouts wondered at Mercury's apparent inaction, but their attention was ripped away when Sailor Moon narrowly dodged another jet of acid by mere millimeters. Mars shouted,  
  
"Come ON Mercury, the Sailor Moon was almost killed!" This roused some reaction from Mercury, but the youma had already spotted the apparently inactive target. The other scouts gasped in horror as a jet of acid sped towards Mercury.  
  
"Look out, Mercury!" Jupiter cried frantically. Mercury became fully alert in time to try and dart out of the way, but still caught the brunt of the acid. Immediately, the acid started to burn and eat away at Mercury's uniform and skin. Mercury's face screwed up in agony; the pain was excruciating. She managed to gasp at Sailor Moon,  
  
"Aim for the stomach!" Sailor Moon sent an energy beam at the youma and the monster finally collapsed, turning into dust. Mercury, on the other, hand, had quickly run to the pond nearby, and was rinsing off all the acid as best she could. However, it was apparent that there were some pretty horrible burns.  
  
The other scouts quickly rushed over, worry and anxiety evident in each of their faces. Ami managed to smile weakly in reassurance, but then Rei burst out,  
  
" Ami, how could you! The princess's life was in danger! She was almost killed! And how could you be so stupid as to just STAND there! I mean, come on, why not just have a large sign that's labeled SITTING DUCK, RIGHT HERE AT YOUR CONVENIENCE! You always were the weakest senshi, and you never really help anyway! It would even be better if you weren't here at all!" The other scouts nodded, and began their own rants towards Ami. They varied between the two themes that Rei had already brought up; that Ami's slowness had almost killed the princess, and that she was an idiot to have stayed a target, practically inviting the youma to attack her. Ami looked at each of the scouts as they berated and scolded her, her normally soft, full lips, tightening into a tight, painful line, and her soft wide blue eyes turning into chips of impenetrable ice. When berations and rebukes had finally stopped, Ami got up from where she had been sitting beside the pond. Her chin was thrust defiantly up, and a new bold light shone in her cold eyes.  
  
"Oh, yes? Well, maybe you forgot who it is that analyzes every situation. Maybe you forgot who it is that everybody depends on for the enemy's weakness. Face it, you guys were just randomly attacking that monster before I got here. You couldn't even defeat a cat without me." The scouts stood flabbergasted at Ami's chill and frosty tone, and even more at her obvious hostile and aggressive stance.  
  
"Besides, why is it that I am obviously the expendable one? The princess's life is SO obviously worth SO much more than mine, isn't that they way it is? Why am I expected to sacrifice MY life for Serena? Don't I have the right to even keep my life for myself? Why is it that Serena's life is SO much more precious that mine, or even yours, or yours, or yours?" Ami asked bitterly, meeting the eyes of each of the scouts. "Yeah, I know the entire duty spiel, but I my life doesn't even belong to me anymore! Selfishness isn't even an option! I'm not anybody except the body guard of Serena! My life BELONGS to Serena, because she's WORTH more than me? Is it because Serena's prettier? Purer? More innocent? More fun? Less shy? WHAT IS IT that makes her life worth more? All men are created equal, despite all our unique differences! But obviously all of you here have trouble comprehending that, don't you?" Ami asked coldly. "And if you're all so sick of me and think that you would be better of without me, then fine." Ami's voice dropped to below freezing, and the pure frozen bitterness rose goosebumps on the scouts' arms.  
  
"I'll just leave. Ditch all you people in the dust. I've been accepted at a early prep college in America. Why don't you just go and see how you do without me? To tell the truth, I'm sick of all of you too. None of you see me as PERSON. You see me as a shy, sweet girl who is only a brain. You only see my INTELLECT, that's all, not the complete person! Yeah, well, I'm sick of it! You can bet that tomorrow I'll be gone and I won't have to put up with any of you SICKENING people anymore!" As Ami had been talking, she had been steadily walking backwards from the group. Every single scout stood with their mouths open, and while they stood there astounded, Ami whirled around and was gone like a streak of light.  
  
The next day, the scouts went to school, hoping to see her there, perhaps make amends, perhaps ask her about her astonishing attitude, but desparately wishing just to see her, talk to her. They asked about her at school, at her mom's house, desparately wishing that Ami hadn't REALLY gone to the prep college. No use. Ami was gone.  
  
To be continued. 


	2. A New World

AN: ok, this chapter doesn't have much action, but I'll get there in the next chapter, or the chapter after that, eventually. Please just keep reading! Again, read and review, and my e-mail is graceofmercury@yahoo.com. Please send comments to that address! Also, I will get back to the scouts back in Japan eventually.  
  
Ami stared out of the plane's window nervously; despite her defiant, brazen words to her "friends" and her persuasion of her mother to let her go to America, Ami was so nervous she thought she might puke. Despite how many times they had ignored her, stereotyped her, unknowingly hurt her, the scouts were the only friends she had ever had.  
  
Ami had read the letter from her host a dozen times. She was fluent in English, but still wasn't sure how her host family would react to her. They were a rather elderly couple, with their own children off to college already, although they wrote that they had one staying with them and commuting to college. She stared down at the now rather worn photograph of the couple. Their benevolent, smiling faces smiled up at her. Ami smiled suddenly to herself, reassured.  
  
"Please buckle your seatbelts; we will be landing shortly." The voice of the stewardess came over the intercom. Ami buckled up and stared out over the ocean for one last time; she felt calm again. After all, water was her element, even if the sea was more Michiru's element than hers.  
  
Ami clutched her suitcase's handle until her knuckles were even whiter than her usual pale shade. She finally spotted two people waving frantically. Wait, there was a blond head behind them, also craning his neck. Ami's brow furrowed, then smoothed. She'd learn who it was when she met them.  
  
"Hi, Ami Mizuno, right? We're the Millers, John and Erin." stated the man, gesturing to himself and his wife. "And this scamp, get over here! You need to greet the pretty girl, you knave!" John hauled a tall, blond boy over, who grinned at Ami. "This scamp is our son, Zach. He's going to the local college, but stays with us for now."  
  
Ami made a small bow, then uttered softly, "I am very pleased to meet all of you. Thank you very much for having me." Zach grinned once more, and both Erin and John chuckled. "No need to be so formal, Ami, you're family now!" Ami looked up, and when she saw the sincerity in each of their faces, she rewarded them with a dazzling smile of her own.  
  
Ami obviously had no idea what a real smile did to her face; it turned a merely pretty, slightly shy girl into a beautiful girl who could have had an army at her feet. John and Erin were a bit startled at the transformation, but Zach was blown away at her beauty.  
  
"Thank you, I think I will have a great time here. " Ami smiled, her eyes twinkling. Noticing Zach's obviously stunned expression, she smiled even more flirtatiously, winking at him. Zach looked like he had just been socked in the stomach. Ami giggled, noticing his drool.  
  
It was her first day at the college prep school. Ami clutched her books to her chest like they were her lifesavers. She made her way down the hall, and nobody noticed the unassuming blue-haired genius. Ami made it through the first few periods of the school day by sheer force of will; normally, at school in Japan, she was able to get lost in the intellectual puzzles of her entire AP course schedule. Now, though, she was so nervous that she couldn't concentrate on anything at.  
  
When she finally made it out into the hall, Ami leaned against a nearby window in an attempt to rally herself.  
  
"Ami, listen up and listen good! You are NOT going to be the shy, sweet, retiring little girl anymore, you hear me? You are going to be the person you always wanted to be! You finally have the opportunity to break loose of all those stereotypes, so that's exactly what you're going to do!"  
  
Despite her brave resolves, Ami was overwhelmed when she entered the cafeteria; the noise and bustle almost choked her. She got her tray and then boldly went up and tapped a girl on the shoulder. She turned around, and Ami's heart almost came out of it's constant position in her throat. The girl's features were open, honest and friendly, though, so Ami swallowed and said,  
  
"Hi! My name is Ami Mizuno. I'm new here; I'm an exchange student from Japan, and I was wondering if I could sit with your lunch group." Ami heard herself speaking boldly, and was a bit startled at her own daring. The girl smiled in return, and said,  
  
"Hi! My name is Ashley, and of course you can eat with me and my friends. We'd be glad to have you. And-"  
  
Ami cut her off with a wicked twinkle in her eye; "Yes, I obviously speak fluent English, America is a nice place, and I like here very much." Ashley blinked, a bit startled, then threw her head back and laughed.  
  
"You obviously have know found out what it's like to be a new person in a strange country. I moved here two years ago from New York, and I got the exact same questions; 'Do you like California? How is the weather compared to there? You don't have an accent; why is that?'" Ashley rolled her eyes as she mimicked those inquisitive outsiders while Ami smiled in sympathy. "Well, since you beat me to the punch, I suppose I need to introduce you to the rest of my friends. Right this way," Ashley said, mock bowing. Ami assumed a grand air, her nose stuck in the air. "Thank you, Ashley" Ami said in her snottiest tone. Ashley snickered, and the two girls went to a table in the corner both giggling.  
  
"Girls, this is Ami Mizuno. She's an exchange student from Japan; she speaks fluent English, thinks America is a nice place, and likes it very much." said Ashley, a wicked sparkle in her eye. Ami stifled a smile as the other girls exchanged non-plussed looks. "Now, this girl here is pretty darn sharp, so you guys better not think you're in for a teddy bear here or anything." Ashley drawled exaggeratedly.  
  
"Darn it! And I felt like picking on somebody too!" One of the dark-haired girls grumbled sarcastically.  
  
"Anyway," said Ashley, pointedly ignoring the other girl, "You all should remember you manners, if you have any, and introduce yourselves."  
  
"Hi, I'm Emily."  
  
"I'm Mary."  
  
"I'm Ruby."  
  
"And I'm Jenna."  
  
"Hi. I'm glad to meet you." Ami said.  
  
"We are too!" chorused the other girls. Mary and Ruby scooted over to make some room for Ami, and pretty soon Ami was chatting with the five girls like they were all old friends. Ami felt so free; nobody here had any stereotypes or set ideas of who she was; nobody looked at her strangely if she laughed too loud, or made rude comments, or was sarcastic or let a few explexitives drop. Nobody thought she was being totally out of character if she expressed interest in boys, or if she made some daring, insinuating observations about the guys on the football teams. Ami felt giddy, almost as if she had drunk a bottle of champagne. She felt light as a feather, almost as if chains had been removed that she hadn't even been aware of. Somewhere in the back of her mind, the scouts and her life in Japan lingered, but she pushed them away and lived for the moment.  
  
Ashley and Ami were walking down the corridor towards their respective classes. Although they had only met an hour before, Ami already felt close to Ashley and could tell that the feeling was reciprocated. Ami liked the other girls well enough, but there was a strong kindness about Ashley that Ami was especially drawn to. They were chatting and gossiping when three shadows fell across them, blocking their path.  
  
"So. You're the new girl. Think you're smart, huh?" sneered one of the girls at Ami. She was tall and heavily made up.  
  
"Karina, we don't want any trouble." Ashley said quietly, but one could hear the steel in her voice.  
  
"Yeah, I'll bet you don't, with a wimp like that at your side." Ami felt an unfamiliar rush of anger; she had been treated like this before, but had always been defensive and turned her feelings inward, rather than outward. Before she could react, though, Ashley stepped in front of Ami, saying "Karina, Ami hasn't done anything to you and if you don't leave her alone, we might have some - trouble." Ashley paused slightly before the last word, then smiled coldly. The other girl girl sneered again, and then all three brushed passed Ami and Ashley.  
  
Ami stuttered, a bit startled, "Thank you for standing up for me. Nobody's, nobody's ever done that before for me." Ashley raised an eyebrow, saying, "There's no need to thank me. Friends stand up for each other, and friends do things for each other without any thought of thanks or reward in return. That's the way that friendship works." Ami blushed, a bit, at the gently worded reprimand, and a bit bashful but extremely pleased to already have been considered a friend. Hastily changing the subject, she asked, "So who's that girl? Seems like she's got a major problem.  
  
Ashley sighed, then said, "That's Karina. She's supposedly popular, but I really feel sorry for her. She comes from a broken family, and her mom's an alcoholic. Also-" here, her voice dropped, and she leaned over closer to Ami, who bent her head to listen better. "I think her boyfriend's abusive; she sometimes comes in with bruises that even her makeup can't hide. So, I think she tries to vent her problems by being belligerent to everybody else." Ashley shook her head. Ami mulled this over on the way of class. She also thought a bit about Ashley's few and succinct words on the nature of friendship; sure, she supposed that she considered Serena her friend and all, but when she defended Serena, Ami always saw her duty as a job and goal to be accomplished. Ami was also somewhat confused about Karina; whenever she had fought youma in Japan, good and bad were clearly designated; the youma were bad, and had to be annihilated at any cost. And yet, and yet- Ami paused here, hesitant. She remembered the sneers from the youma, and the sneer on Karina's face seemed to be an exact copy. But, Ami thought she could detect a hint of desparation, pleading, insecurity beneath Karina's sneer. Could it be, thought Ami suddenly, that the youma had feelings beneath that mask of a sneer? It certainly seemed that Karina did, and Ami suddenly remembered her own experience with masks. It seemed that back in Japan, Ami was always behind a mask of a shy, sweet girl, whose only real asset was her intellect. And yet, Ami KNEW she, herself, was more than that. Why, she had come to America so she could break out of that mask! Could it be that both the youma and Karina were more than their masks revealed? Ami shook her head; it was becoming dizzy with all this heavy thinking. Ami entered her next class; American history. 


	3. Back in Japan

"Ouch!" Serena yelped painfully as a spark from the youma hit her. She winced as she fingered the burn on her cheek from an earlier spark that she had also failed to dodge.  
  
"Flame Sniper!" Rei managed to hit the youma on the shoulder, but instead of damaging it, the youma only became more irritate and began charging after a now very flustered Sailor Mars.  
  
*Dammit, Ami, you were right! We do need you here, probably more than you or we ever realized! We're sorry, all right! We NEED you! How could you leave us all alone when we need your help!?!* Sailor Mars thought furiously as she attempted to run in her four-inch heels.  
  
"Moon Scepter Elimination!" In desparation, Sailor Moon shot one last attack at the monster. Finally, after an hour of fighting, the youma finally collapsed into the ground.  
  
Breathing heavily, Sailor Mars limped over to Serena. Tuxedo Mask (AN: yeah, I know he wasn't there earlier, but I found a use for him in this chapter, so voila! here he is!) was already there, supporting Sailor Moon, who sported various cuts and scrapes. The other scouts also gathered around their leader, all of them sporting a motley mix of minor and some not-so- minor wounds.  
  
"You guys, we need Ami." Sailor Jupiter's voice was quiet but firm. The other scouts nodded in assent, but then Sailor Mars burst out,  
  
"How could she do this to us? She's part of our team, and how could she just run out on us like that?"  
  
"Mars, you know that she only went to America after you guys railed and ranted and raved at her for being the weak senshi. I mean, she probably felt that she was underappreciated, and who wants to stick around with friends like that?" Tuxedo Mask asked, his voice neutral with a hint of chill in it as he held Sailor Moon.  
  
"But we need her! And we were only railing and ranting at her because we were worried! She's our friend, and we just couldn't believe that she could come close to dying!" Minako cried.  
  
"Yes, Venus, I realize that all of you were ranting at her in part because you were worried about her, but do you think she knew that? Did you tell her that you were yelling at her because you were worried for her? Even though Ami is an intellectual genius, she has a little trouble with emotions, and I suspect that she wouldn't have been as hurt if she'd realized that you were railing at her because you were concerned for her. " Tuxedo Mask's voice became gentler as he looked around at the scouts' stunned faces.  
  
"I'm just trying to play devil's advocate. You can't shift all of the blame on Ami; in fact, there really is no blame at all. Just misunderstandings."  
  
The scouts seemed to digest this, then Jupiter looked at her watch and said, "Three in the morning! My gosh, people, we're going to be so dead come tomorrow!" With a quick smile, Jupiter detransformed and Lita was gone in a flash. Venus and Mars powered down similarly and also rushed home in hopes of catching some sleep.  
  
Sailor Moon stood quietly off to the side, staring at the moonlit lake. She detransformed quietly, and there stood Serena, gilded in moonlight, staring at the lake as if it held the answers to her life. Perhaps it did.  
  
Serena had a pensive expression on her face, which was extremely unsual for her. Tuxedo Mask detransformed to, and then Darien came up quietly behind her and enfolded her in his arms.  
  
"Penny for your thoughts?" Darien asked quietly.  
  
Serena sighed, then turned her face away from the lake. "I don't know." said Serena, equally quietly. "It's just that, that everything that Ami said has been passing in my mind, and all of a sudden, I don't know if I can believe in who I am anymore. My friends protect me almost every day with their lives, but would I be willing to make an equal sacrifice for them? Friendship is a two-way street, and it seems like I'm not holding up my end of the bargain. Am I even worthy of that type of protection, that type of devotion? It's like their only duty, their only function in life is to protect me. They know that; Ami knew that, before she went to America, and she left because she felt that she was more than a guard. But I never really thought about it; my friends are my bodyguards, and sometimes they have to sacrifice their identity and their lives for me. One person. One girl. One adolescent girl. I don't understand it, Darien, I don't understand it at all." Serena buried her face in his chest.  
  
Darien stared across the lake. "Serena, I love you, and I know that you're a worthy person. However, I will say that being a bodyguard is not an easy position. I mean, coming to the rescue of my one true love is easy for me," Darien smiled tenderly down at Serena's tear-stained face,  
  
"But the rest of the scouts have their own lives, their own identites, and finding those identities can be hard when you're a scout, a bodyguard, have the memories from the Silver Millenium, and also have to act like an ordinary student. And about your worth as a person versus another scout, well," here, Darien heaved a sigh.  
  
"All men are created equal. Ami recognized that truth, and realized that her position as bodyguard was false in the face of that truth. What can I say? The system of royalty sucks, but that's who you inherently are, Serena. You are the Moon Princess. Ami is the Mercurian Princess. Your rank is higher than hers; says nothing about who she is. Says nothing about who you are. There's not much we can do about it, but perhaps we should realize that each of the scouts are your equal. Not your inferior, not your superior. But your equal."  
  
Serena looked across the lake once again, a small smile playing at her lips. "How did you get so wise, Muffin?"  
  
"I must have picked it up from my girlfriend, Bunny." Darien smiled at her. They stood there, content for a few more moments of tranquillity. 


End file.
